The Invisible Line
Last year, while 7 months pregnant, I went to a hot ass New Orleans at the peak of summer to attend Essence Fest. My television pilot, Aisha, made it as an official selection. And while I don’t necessarily recommend walking up and down NOLA streets sweating with a baby tap dancing on your bladder- I couldn’t pass up the opportunity. As a result, I asked my OBGYN if it was safe to attend. I explained to her why I was traveling and the fact I was going to be in Essence Film Festival, and before I left I remember her telling me. . .”Wow you must really be the next Issa Rae.” Now, of course this was meant to be a flattering compliment, but it actually took every ounce of me to not sharply reply back. . . “I am Issa Rae.” Meaning, I love her, I am her, I see myself in her, we pretty much do the same thing, but she’s just famous, and oh I just haven’t broken in yet because I sort of been juggling two careers and a family. Let’s just say my silly little ego had a moment. So instead I just chuckled, walked out, and said “Yeah, thanks”. . .once again silently coming to terms with the feeling of knowing what you’re capable of, but accepting that you just haven’t crossed the line. This feeling sits with me most days.
The Big Break
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about breaking into the film industry and the fact that I really haven’t yet- at least not in the way I want to. If you also have been thinking about the same, no matter what industry you’re in, let’s take a moment to intentionally release any anxiety this has ever caused you, and calm our nervous systems down. Most indie filmmakers or creatives— we’ve built a strong portfolio and were continuing to do the work, but we just haven’t made it passed the so called gatekeepers— the high profile commercial gigs, the bougie execs, super competitive fellowships, or major network deals. Maybe you’re at the stage where you know you’re damn good and ready, but no one will give you the golden chance, because you haven’t already had, well. . . another golden chance. You’re still on the other side of success, but are you really?
The Success
What level of success is good enough, even when you are already making major inroads, impact, and influence in your respective communities? I think it’s important to explore just exactly what and which opportunities define success for you, in whatever field you happen to be in. For the filmmakers out there- is it an Oscar, having a box office hit, streaming deal, or being able to showrun your own original television show? And if it is. . .why? Aren’t you already doing the work you love to do? Is it more about the accolades or the experience? For most, we focus on the prestige of it all, but not necessarily what it means for our lives. While it may seem natural to always reach for the other side, if we’re always doing that will we truly ever be happy?
The Reality
I became super laser focused on this topic last week, so I sat down with amazing director B.Monét. Together we discussed how things aren’t always glam on the other side, while also acknowledging that it’s okay to want more. I’m a big proponent of letting people be great, without trying to always highlight misery or downplay wins in order to feel better about ourselves. That being said, and having also experiencing this myself, sometimes your wins lead to dead ends even though all the people see are the successes. Sometimes the big wins took big sacrifices that no one will have a clue about. Also, nobody sees you in the waiting periods when you don’t have any work. The epiphany of this meeting was that following my own path and trusting the work I am putting into my own projects is totally okay and is totally enough. In this season, and if you haven’t realized it by now— you should be betting on yourself and standing ten toes down on the work you’re putting out- Cowboy Carter style. It’s always best to focus on putting out work you’re sincerely proud of instead of worrying about the metrics, the critics, and how it will be perceived. Some other key points from our conversation are below:
Make sure your current work reflects the work that you want to do.
Timing and networking are still tried and true.
Opportunity + preparation = Success
Ultimately your success relies on your energetic alignment and divine calling.
If we take a look at Issa, Ava, Spike or whomever, the lesson is still the same. Just because other people are taking a certain path to get to a certain level doesn’t mean that path will necessarily work for you. Case studies show us that the best way to launch is by being authentically you.
This Week’s Affirmation
I surrender to God’s timing.
This Week’s Homework
Last week I voice recorded myself recapping my career timeline, capital, wins big and small. Then I listened to the playback. It was quite a revolutionary experience. I invite you to do the same. Journaling this is great too.
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Work with me to bring your vision to life, creative or holistic.
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What’s your ideal big break or best version of success? Comment below.
Thanks so much for sharing my dear! So thought provoking.